Lyrics [Act One]

“Live In Living Color”

FRANK JR.
Live in living color
Let me take you for a ride
Yes, I’m live in living color
So sit back and let me be your T.V. Guide!

I gotta story I’d like to tell
But I’m gonna need help to tell it well
I gotta story about fame and money
And it’s got more curves than a Playboy Bunny
I wanna live not just survive
I wanna tell my story live and in living color

FRANK JR. & ENSEMBLE
Live in living color
Something special’s up tonight
Yes, I’m live in living color
Life ain’t lived in black and white

FRANK JR.
I gotta tale of a great romancer
And it’s got more moves than a go-go-dancer
I gotta story that’s fast and slick
And it’s got more twists than a peppermint stick

I don’t have the time for the nine to five
I gotta tell my story live and in living color!

FRANK JR. & ENSEMBLE
Live in living color
And it’s brought to you by me
Yes, I’m live in living color
This won’t fit in your T.V.!

FRANK JR.
What’s a name?
Just window dressing
Everybody know that it’s the clothes that make the man

Play the game
Just keep ‘em guessing
Mix and match me
Try to catch me if you can

I gotta story that’s strange but true
So come fly with me for a bird’s eye-view
I’ve got the world at my command
And I’ll be your one-man Disneyland

I don’t wanna wait for the cops to arrive
I wanna tell my story live and in living color

FRANK JR. & ENSEMBLE
Live in living color
Tune me in and turn me on
Yes, I’m live in living color
Blink your eyes and I’ll be gone

Yes, I’m live in living color
The me in and turn me on
Yes, I’m live in living color
Blink your eyes
Blink your eyes
And I’ll be gone!

“The Pinstripes Are All That They See”

FRANK SR.
When your mother walked into
that dancehall in Montrichard
What did she see?
Through the haze of champagne
Did she notice my brain or my college degree?

Kid, what she saw… was the uniform!
Through the dirt and debris
Yes, those ladies gave thanks to us visiting Yanks
Cause the pinstripes are all that they see

When a pilot walks onto the plane
And the passengers smile and relax

GIRLS
Smile and relax

FRANK SR.
Do they know he’s still tight
from that party last night?
Or the back to back “Jacks”?

GIRLS
Stewed to the max

FRANK SR.
No! What they see in the uniform
How it fits to a T
Like the visiting team that the Yankees will cream
The pinstripes are all that they see

If you wanna be a someone
you can’t look like a bum
A book’s judged by its cover
That’s the first rule of thumb

I wanna see ya take off
straight to the top floor
Start dressin’ to impress ‘em
and son you’ll stroll in the front door
A kid in a man’s candy store

Every lawyer’s bespoke to the nines
To a jury he’s smart and refined

GIRLS
Smart and refined

FRANK SR.
Do they see with one look
the defendant’s a crook
or that justice is blind?

GIRLS
Watch the wheels grind

FRANK SR.
What they see is the uniform
as he bargains a plea
They all cease and desist
He’s so hard to resist
Cause the pinstripes are all that they see

FRANK SR. & FRANK JR.
Yes, we’re gonna hit the high life
We’ve only just begun
We’re gonna be together

Frank Sr. and son dine at the Latin Quarter
A night cap at “Toots Shor”
Yeah, we’re gonna be at ringside
And life will be better than before
For two kids in a man’s candy store

“Someone Else’s Skin”

FRANK JR.
There’s no phone booth
There’s no cape
There’s no Steve McQueen
to help me make my great escape

How can I fly
like a hero in the sky?
Be a shooting star out in
the stratosphere

Where’s “The Shadow”?
He might know
Where’s that searchlight in the sky
to point the way to go?

Through some new cloud
to disappear into the crowd
Through the future’s dark
there’s one thing crystal clear
That there’s no home here

So many voices telling me to choose
It’s like a game where either team I lose
This kinda noise just makes me wanna shout
I’d like to buy a one-way ticket out

Rules of the road say don’t look back
Eyes straight ahead, don’t jump the track
Try a new game and pray that I can win

‘Cause I just don’t feel at home in mine
So I’ll slip now
Into someone else’s skin

I see the maps from every book I’ve read
The worlds that I have lived inside my head
I thought a love like theirs could never die
If it can fade away then so can I

Yeah, first you see me, then you don’t
Don’t look for me
You know I won’t even be there
So let the games begin

‘Cause I just don’t feel at home in mine
So I’ll slip now
Into someone else’s skin

Run down the street
Run out of town
I’m gonna run from the home team
And never touch down

Run from the books
‘Cause it’s all been a fake
I’m gonna run from the choices
that I don’t wanna make

School’s not out but I can’t wait
It’s the perfect time to graduate today
I’m gonna run away now
I’ve got to run away

I know they’ll see the truth
When I move on
They’ll need each other
Much more once I’m gone

And when I’m flush
and he’s back on his feet
I’ll pick him up and ride
down easy street

No time to cry for all the years
A rusty gas tank full of tears
gets you nowhere
Not the places I want in

And I just don’t feel home in mine
So I’ll slip now
Into someone else’s skin
Into someone else’s skin
Into someone else’s skin
Into someone else’s skin

“Jet Set”

STEWARDESSES
Woke up in Brooklyn
with a frown upon my face
Just left Wisconsin
where there’s cheese enough to start this rat race
But thanks to the Brothers Wright
We don’t know where we’ll sleep tonight
Yes, I’m a bird in the skies
and tomorrow when I rise

I’ll wake up in Paris
with a new love in my heart
Or maybe Germany
with that brand new pet I met in Stuttgart
Sky’s the limit, time to play
I’ll put down roots some other day
No need to be a lonely Joe
The jet is the only way to go

Would’ja like new music and mystery
each and every day
Lose the same old music and history
Make a new friend then fly away

And wake up in Texas
where they’ll treat their women right
And then try Hollywood
where the stars get lit out in broad daylight

And city, near or far
feels twice as good as where you are
When you’re sick of the status quo
the jet set is the only way to go

PILOTS
Would’ja like a sleigh ride? A hayride?
Then kiddo, just stay home
But, if you want jet set then get set
to leave behind Kansas
There’s no place like Rome

STEWARDESSES
Wake up in Rio
Have your coffee in Brazil

PILOTS
When real life gets you down
Take a…

PILOTS & STEWARDESSES
… Far-out, one-way
trip to Splitzville

PILOTS
Swedish, Greek, or Japanese

STEWARDESSES
A stewardess is trained to please

PILOTS & STEWARDESSES
So if you’ve got what it takes below
Well then fly this bird like cupid’s bow
‘Cause the jet set’s just a holiday
Yeah the jet set goes up, up and away… so fly!

FRANK JR.
Right down to Italy for La Bella Femmina
Jump in a fountain for a…

ALL
Big dose of La Dolce Vita

FRANK JR.
If your tastes run more risqué

STEWARDESSES
Well then we know a joint in Old Bombay

ALL
So hang on tight, let’s loop de loop
It’s time to fly this chicken coop

So, pack up your suitcase
Check your worries at the gate
Come out and play boy
Cruise the world to find
your perfect playmate

FRANK JR.
Things look better from above
So buckle up, next stop is love

ALL
From Timbuktu to Tokyo
From Mozambique to Mexico
Yeah the jet set is the
only way to go

“Don’t Break The Rules”

HANRATTY
It starts very early
once the baby toys are gone
A kid on the playground
has to choose what side he’s on

It’s the bullies or the good guys
Boy, there ain’t no middle ground
Though hoodlums try to blur the line
And twist the truth around

Then they call themselves a winner
But they’re self-deceiving fools
‘Cause the game ain’t worth winning
if you’re breaking all the rules

The law is laid upon us
when as kids we first ask “Why?”
Our parents set the rules when
“‘Cause I said so,” they reply

And through I thought I hated them
and screamed with all my might
The next time that I had a choice
Gee whiz! I did what’s right

You know I never snuck a drink
I never stole a pack of “Kools”
‘Cause the game ain’t worth winning
if you’re breaking all the rules

MEN
Don’t break the rules!

HANRATTY
Or else we’re living
in the wild, wild west

MEN
Don’t break the rules!

HANRATTY
God’s keeping score
and you don’t wanna fail that test

MEN
Don’t break the rules!

HANRATTY
You thumb your nose
right at the life for which I strive
But those rules,
Those laws keep us alive

HANRATTY
Well it started back with Moses
when he led around the Jews

MEN
The Jews!

HANRATTY
And climbed way up that mountain
to pick up God’s daily news

MEN
Tell me the news!

HANRATTY
He schlepped up old Mt. Sinai
Cried and begged on their behalf

MEN
Oh lord!

HANRATTY
He almost dropped those tablets
when he saw that golden calf

MEN
What?

HANRATTY
Now we teach the Ten Commandments
every Sunday in our schools
‘Cause the game ain’t worth winning
if you’re breaking all the rules

HANRATTY
I guess he Constitution, boys,
to some is too complex

MEN
We’re thinkin’

HANRATTY
They think our founding fathers fought so
they could forge some checks

MEN
And now it’s lookin’

HANRATTY
They see themselves as Robin Hood
Just stealing from the rich

MEN
And doncha’ know they’re

HANRATTY
Not paying back the things they take
Well, pay back is a bitch

MEN
Pow!!

HANRATTY
‘Cause the world ain’t Sherwood Forest
You can’t give away those jewels
‘Cause the game ain’t worth winning
if you’re breaking all the rules

MEN
Don’t break the rules

HANRATTY
Or else we’re living in the wild, wild west

MEN
Don’t break the rules

HANRATTY
God’s keeping score
and you don’t wanna fail that test

MEN
Don’t break the rules

HANRATTY
You thumb your nose
right at the life for which I strive
But those rules, those laws keep us alive
When you steal somebody’s money
screw his daughter or his wife

MEN
Wop!

HANRATTY
You don’t think of repercussions
as your tap dance through your life

MEN
Bop!

HANRATTY
Though you smile like you’re a hero
You’re an outlaw through and through
But the odds are in my favor, man
And one day I’ll catch you
So, go sneak into a movie
Run a red light, sell some pot

MEN
Doo-wop, doo-wop!

HANRATTY
It’s all the same to me
You’re either guilty or your not

MEN
Doo-wop, doo-wop, wow!

HANRATTY
If we all did what we wanted
every time we felt the urge
The world would be in total chaos
It’s already on the verge

MEN
Bop!

HANRATTY
Yes, it’s laws that keep us human
‘Cause without them we’re just mules
And
The game ain’t worth winning
Yes
The game ain’t worth winning
No
The game ain’t worth winning
If you’re breaking all the rules

MEN
Don’t break the rules

HANRATTY
Or else we’re living in the wild, wild west

MEN
Don’t break the rules

HANRATTY
God’s keeping score
and you don’t wanna fail that test

MEN
Don’t break the rules

“Butter Outta Cream”

FRANK JR.
Remember that story I learned at your feet?
Well now it’s my turn, take a seat

Two little mice of great renown
fell in some milk and one proceeded to drown
The other one’s still the toast of the town
‘Cause he made butter outta cream

He looked around, deduced his plight
Said “This is no way to spend a Saturday night!”
But he had the style to make things right
So he made butter outta cream

He kicked his legs up
He tossed and turned
So not to end up a ghost
He did the hokey-pokey till the cream was churned
Then baby, he walked right out and buttered his toast

Now he’s on top for goodness sakes
Yeah, he’s the big cheese up at “Land O’ Lakes”
He’s living proof that pop all it takes is a scheme
So if you land in the gutter just make butter out of cream

FRANK SR.
There was a cockroach in Brazil
Got drunk at his local coffee mill
He thought his time was up until
he made coffee outta beans

When he came to hear heard such a sound
Then much to his shock when he looked around
he had been scooped and was about to be ground
So, he made coffee out of beans

He marched to the south and stomped to the north
He had to race against fate
He did the cucaracha ’til the tears poured forth
Then señor, things began to percolate

He held his breath and swam to the top
He borrowed beans from his mom and pop
and opened his own coffee shop out in Queens!
When his lights were almost off,
he just made coffee outta beans

So think of those two when life’s the pits
“The Bug”

FRANK JR.
And “The Mouse”

BOTH
At the end of their wits
they knew the key to life
is that it’s wha’ cha dream

So if lemons clog your sink up
Don’t just stand around and scream
Spike up some lemonade and drink up
And make butter out of cream

FRANK SR.
Just make butter out of cream

FRANK JR.
Make some butter out of cream

FRANK SR.
I hear what you’re saying son
I’ll make butter outta cream

FRANK JR.
Sha-doo-bah-dwee-leeyah-
doo-bah-dwee-leeyah-doo-bop!

“The Man Inside The Clues”

HANRATTY
Some comic books
A Miss July
A matchbook from “The Flame”
Some chewing gum
A mismatched pair of shoes

A letter home but never mailed
A check without a name
Yeah, they’ll be my guide
to the man inside the clues

A bobby pin
Two baseball cards
Some day-old Chinese food
Two ticket stubs
The Red Sox always lose

A Valentine but never sent
A scent to sett the mood
When I take a ride
with the man inside the clues

Do Not Disturb is on the door
The maid, she never comes
He locked the door
but I don’t need a key

There’s only garbage on the floor
To others, they’re just crumbs
Those crumbs look like a five-course meal to me

I used my head to get in his
So I can think like him
I see he flies and also cries the blues

But if I look at my own life
I’m out here on a limb
Yeah, it’s best to hide
Stay the man inside the clues

I’ve looked into so many lives
but never at my own
The trail I left is such a damn cliché

The lonely wife,
the house for sale
A million nights alone
to wish you had the things you threw away

Like a front door key
A home cooked meal
The happy bride and groom
Then life kicks in and makes you pay your dues

And then you find
you’re by yourself
in a single motel room
That’s been occupied
by the man inside
the clues
the clues

“Christmas Is My Favorite Time Of Year”

HANRATTY
Yeah, don’tcha love the yuletide fun?
There’s joy and cheer for everyone
I wait for Santa with a gun
Yes, Christmas is my favorite time of year

FRANK JR.
Some sugar plums I haven’t kissed
But mistletoe I must resist
‘Cause I’m on St. Carl’s Most Wanted List

HANRATTY & FRANK JR.
Yes, Christmas is my favorite time of year

HANRATTY, FRANK JR., FRANK SR. & PAULA
And there’s a home where you can’t go
And there’s a life that’s full of love
you used to know

HANRATTY
For me it’s true

FRANK SR.
But kid, not you

PAULA
‘Cause you’r family’s here…

FRANK SR. & PAULA
Yeah, they’re still yours to hold
If you…

FRANK SR., PAULA & HANRATTY
Come in from the cold

HANRATTY
So, if tomorrow Santa’s flown
The tree is down and you’re alone
I’m always here, right by the phone

FRANK JR. & HANRATTY
Yes, Christmas is my favorite time of year

FRANK JR.
I’ll call you soon,
but who knows when

HANRATTY
And, Frank, I hope we’ll meet again
Like when you’re serving eight to ten

FRANK JR. & HANRATTY
Yes, Christmas is my favorite time of year